Big Win for the Couldn't Give a Shit Party

The Couldn't Give a Shit Party won a dramatic victory in the Brent East by-election yesterday, securing 64% of the vote. While not hitting the heights of some of their other victories in the past, notably the Leeds by-election of 1999, where they secured around 80% of the vote, this is still a remarkable result. With so much at stake for the also rans of Labour, Lib Dem and Conservatives, pundits might have expected a lower turnout for the Couldn't Give a Shits. Iraq, the Hutton Enquiry and the claims of the Lib Dems of being the "official" opposition were all factors that should have squeezed the Couldn't Give a Shit vote, but their support has once again held solid.

A spokesman for the Couldn't Give a Shits said, "This result must surely signal a change in British Politics. It is scandalous that our party, which secured such a massive majority here, and had, it must be remembered, the biggest share of the vote (41%) in the last general election, is still unrepresented in Parliament. The British people are speaking with a remarkably clear voice, but the vested interests of those in power are just not listening."

Critics of the Couldn't Give a Shits point out that under current voting conditions, it is impossible to tell who are the true supporters of the Couldn't Give a Shits and who are supporters of the much more politically significant None of the Above Party, some of whose supporters are pushing for voting to be made compulsory provided a generic None of the Above candidate is allowed to stand. This is unlikely to happen, as it suits all the established parties to confuse the two groups.