I've not been very curmudgeonly recently. In fact I thought I was going soft, thought that my inexorable drift towards old gitdom was looking less inexorable by the day.

I am happy, in a misanthropic sort of way, to say that television came to my rescue last night and set me back on the right track.

There I was, brandy in one hand, clicker in the other with an hour or two to kill before bed. After Newsnight got too boring - there's only so much gloating over IDS's misfortune that you can do in one day - what did I find?

Sky 1 had The Villa, a bunch of kids trying to fuck each other. Channel 4, a programme about some kids trying to find a fuck buddy, which, apparently, is something between a boyfriend/girlfriend and a one night stand. BBC 3 had something with Denise Van Outen and Essex in the title, which I didn't even think of watching, but was probably about someone in white stilettoes trying to find someone to fuck. And i'm sure there was at least one other programme with sex in the title.

Now, I've never thought of myself as a prude, but what is this prurient shit all about? Your Villas and Real Sex and Ibiza Uncovereds and your documentaries about the sex industry which are just an excuse to show snatches of soft porn? I mean, who watches it? Isn't three quarters of the internet and about twenty pay per view sex channels enough for your average wanker?